If the dawn chorus is the first sign of spring, then which annual tradition heralds the advent of ‘silly season’? Some rather questionable reports linking an £89 million Galactico with a summer move Arsenal, perhaps?
With April Fool’s Day just around the corner, what better time to reflect on some of this year’s oddest transfer rumours.
Steven Bergwijn – Tottenham Hotspur to Arsenal
If the respective frontlines of Liverpool and Manchester City can boast quality and quantity in abundance, then Arsenal’s is high on the former but lacking in the latter. Some much-needed depth is required, especially if Mikel Arteta guides the Gunners back into the promised land of the Champions League group-stages.
But Steven Bergwijn (Calciomercato)? A £27 million forward who, in over 50 Premier League games, has scored just six goals?
His rather underwhelming track record in England’s top flight is one thing. But the fact he is currently under contract at Arsenal’s most hated rivals surely makes this a piece of tabloid gossip that deserves to house only greasiest portion of bone-filled cod.
Yes, Tottenham are open to offers for Bergwijn this summer. But you get the feeling that Daniel Levy would rather prance around North London with only an Arsenal scarf covering his nether-regions than selling a player to Spurs’ neighbours.
Oh, and we’re sorry about the imagery…
Ugurcan Cakir – Trabzonspor to Leeds United
You know the summer is close when Ugurcan Cakir is being linked with a big-money move to England via the Turkish press. These rumours are to the transfer window what the John Lewis advert is to Christmas.
In recent times, the Trabzonspor shot-stopper has been mentioned as a potential signing for Liverpool, Wolves, Tottenham Hotspur and more without anything coming to fruition.
Now, it’s Leeds’ turn. Fanatik claim that the Yorkshire giants contacted Cakir’s representatives last week.
There can be no doubts about Cakir’s potential. He is a top-class ‘keeper in the making and continues to shine for a Trabzonspor side closing in on their first Super Lig title since the 1984.
But Leeds are never going to pay £17 million for a new glovesman. Not when they already have the excellent Illan Meslier between the sticks.
And while Meslier has his admirers, the syrup-voiced Frenchman is going nowhere this summer.
Eden Hazard – Real Madrid to Arsenal
The phrase ‘busted flush’ should not be thrown around willy nilly. After all, it’s not long since we were sounding the death knell for David Moyes’ top-fligh career.
And, on occasions, Hazard has sprinkled the odd fistful of stardust on the hallowed Bernabeu turf. The occasional reminder that he can still produce moments of mind-bending technique.
But the fact that Carlo Ancelotti has decided against bringing him off the bench in any of Real Madrid’s last four La Liga games tells it’s own story. His snake-hipped brilliance dimmed by a niggling series of injuries, a creaking, crumbling Hazard makes for rather sad viewing these days.
The sporting equivalent of watching Bruce Willis coast dispassionately through another one of those paint-by-numbers, straight-to-video action flicks.
Reports linking Hazard with Arsenal, then, are most probably nonsense (Defensa Central).
Especially when you consider that the Gunners, burned by that expensive Willian disaster, are prioritising young, hungry, athletic, up-and-comers these days. Every one of last summer’s six signings were aged 23 or younger.
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