Stan Collymore has issued a stinging response to Arsenal’s apparent interest in Barcelona man Philippe Coutinho, telling the Mirror (26 May, page 47) that the Brazilian play-maker has “less bite than my 89-year-old mum with her teeth out.”
Ask anyone where the Gunners are going wrong right now and you’d imagine most would point to a complete lack of drive, control and leadership in the heart of Mikel Arteta’s midfield.
During Arsene Wenger’s heyday, Patrick Vieira, Emmanuel Petit and Gilberto Silva were patrolling the Highbury turf with an iron glove and a velvet touch.
An Arsenal side who are sitting a distant ninth in the Premier League table are being forced to rely on the unreliable Grant Xhaka, Lucas Torreira and Matteo Guendouzi. They are talented footballers no doubt, but hardly the kind of match-winning midfielders capable of securing a top four finish, let alone a convincing title charge.
Given that Coutinho is hardly renowned for his ability to grab the game by the scruff of it’s neck, more the icing on the cake than the sturdy sponge base, you can see where Collymore is coming from.
“So Arsenal have joined the race for Philippe Coutinho,” the former Liverpool and Aston Villa striker quipped.
“He’d fit in well at the Emirates with the rest of the nice, soft and cuddly Gunners, who have less bite than my 89-year-old mum with her teeth out.”
According to the Sun, Arsenal is just one potential destination for Coutinho, who has struggled to make a real impression on loan at Bayern Munich this season.
Barcelona are desperate to sell in order to raise funds for Inter Milan forward Lautaro Martinez, though the Brazilan’s staggering £290,000-a-week wages mean fans of a cash-strapped Gunners side should not be holding their breath.
And if you ask Arsenal fans who still look back fondly at that ‘Invincible’ era, they will tell you that an Ivan Rakitic or an Arturo Vidal would perhaps be a better addition to Arteta’s lightweight midfield than a play-maker who has flickered into life only briefly over the last two years.
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