Lambert was out of work while Glasgow Rangers were looking for a new boss, but Graeme Murty landed the Ibrox role instead.
Paul Lambert gave an emphatic response when asked if Rangers were talking to him about the recent managerial vacancy at Ibrox.
Rangers went two months without a full-time boss after Pedro Caixinha's sacking in late October, although Gers Under-20s coach Graeme Murty has since been handed the role until the end of the campaign.
Lambert was unemployed throughout that period, before taking the reins at Stoke City earlier this week.
But when the former Celtic captain was asked if there was any chance he had been approached by the Bhoys' Old Firm rivals Rangers, he left Talksport listeners in little doubt.
"Oh no! Absolutely no chance. No, no," Lambert said on Wednesday's Jim White show. "I think it is [the phone melting in his hand] - I think the whole car’s melted!
"Listen, I had a fantastic time at Celtic. I’m really proud of what we done there, captaining the club and things like that. I always keep an eye on how they get on and there’s good people there, people I know well - Brendan’s doing a great job there.
"My ties are obviously with Celtic, so absolutely not - that [the Rangers question] just makes me laugh."
Rangers have won seven of their 12 Premiership fixtures since Murty took temporary charge and will climb to second in the standings with a win against Aberdeen next week.
Lambert, meanwhile, will take charge of his first game as Stoke boss on Saturday, when Huddersfield Town visit the Bet365 Stadium.
Are Rangers better off with Murty than Lambert?