Dwarf Tossing - The Rules

Dwarf Tossing

Dwarf-tossing is outlawed in France and in several US states. A United Nations human rights committee ruled that the 'sport' is contrary to human dignity.

For those not in the know, a dwarf is generally defined as an individual who is 4' 10'' tall or shorter. And there really is a British Association of Dwarf Throwers. And you really can rent-a-dwarf in the US via the website www.shortdwarf.com 

And there's apparently also a technique for dwarf-tossing. 6' 7'' Sean Rooney is said to have been tossing his 4' 2'' twin brother for years. He says that you should grab the handles on the dwarf's back and stand sideways, with your feet shoulder-width apart. You should then swing the dwarf back as high as you can and then, in one swift motion, hurl him (or her) forward.

The longest dwarf-toss ever recorded is said to have been made by Jimmy Leonard, a UK truck driver. Jimmy is said to have tossed 4' 4'' 98lb Lenny the Giant 11 feet five inches. Reports of a 30 feet toss made in Australia remain unconfirmed.

Now, there are also rules in place for dwarf tossing, and these are designed with the safety of the dwarf in mind:

If a dwarf is to be thrown though a glass window or door, he (or she) must wear protective clothing, including a suitable mask.

Extinguishers must be provided nearby if a dwarf is being tossed through a burning hoop.

There must be at least three inches of water at the foot of any well a dwarf is being tossed down.

And if a dwarf is to be thrown across the path of an oncoming train, the organisers must ensure that the tosser has no personal grudge against the dwarf.

Finally, it's the dwarves who get the last laugh. Those who fly through the air with the greatest of ease can earn six-figure sums each year. The dwarves probably earn more than the 'tossers'.

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