Obama came to "listen and provide American leadership". Well baby, I've been listening and I will follow your lead. You say regulation of hedge funds? I say regulation of hedge funds managers. Po-tay-to, pot-ah-to, as they say.

I read that women are divorcing their City men so fast it's as if their gardeners were refusing to sh*g them until they did.

Look out, guys. HITCitizen Jamie Morgan is here to set you straight on dating. Ladies, breathe a sigh of relief. Got something to say about it? Your comments below, please.

And if you fail to execute it properly, you will leave with a hand full of gold dust. Or a fractured ego.

So close, the smell of their aftershave invites you closer. Touching but not. An inadvertant brush of body parts, an adventure in your head. The new extremes of freakishness.

Be it the markets, the pain I feel for Northern Rock, or - perhaps most likely - city life just catching up with me, I'm stressed. My quest to alleviate this situation has led to the all important bottom line (lined with lingerie) and is here for you to profit from....

The biggest arbitrage opportunity of the romantic world (that's s.x to you) is here. Welcome to Valentine's Day.

"People today know the price of everything and the value of nothing." As true today as it was when Wilde said it. Watch the value, watch the price, watch for the difference, exploit it. That's your happy profit just there.

Lawyers and bankers and accountants! Oh, my! Lawyers and bankers and accountants! Oh, my! As I stroll down the yellow brick road on the way to romance and true love (and let's not kid ourselves, a ring), I'm beginning to feel more and more like Dorothy.