Newcastle United to make big changes... by issuing a new club suit

Chancel Mbemba

When you've just been thumped 6-1, the natural response is to get your players all fancy new suits...

While their performances on the pitch have been about as good looking as a pair of poorly stitched joggers from an unnamed sports shop, Newcastle United's players have looked pretty sharp off the field.

Why? Well it was all thanks to summer signing Chancel Mbemba, who decided to turn up for the first game of the season while wearing a very nice looking tuxedo. 

Then, fellow summer arrival, Florian Thauvin, also decided join in the tux fun, proving that Newcastle might just be the best-dressed side in the Premier League. 

However, the likes of Alan Shearer reckon it distracts focus away from the game, although assistant manager Paul Simpson told WhatCulture: "I think over the time we probably will try to introduce a club suit so that we have a - it sounds the wrong word to use - but so that we have a club 'uniform' so that everyone turns up looking the business.

"I always think it looks good when the whole team turn up and they look smart and I think it’s a statement of intent, that’s the way we look at it."

And, according to the Chronicle, Mike Ashley is ready to buy his team all a special suit for their next game against Norwich City. 

Well, that will absolutely sort out all of Newcastle's problems and will 100 per cent see them stay up and probably even qualify for the Champions League...

One thing is for sure, they really don't want to end up looking like Liverpool in the 1996 FA Cup final, those white suits were shocking! 

Register for NEWCASTLE UNITED team updates

Register for HITC Sport - Daily Dispatch