1. Cheap Aftershave Man
The man clearly bathed in cheap aftershave immediately before the interview. He will probably wear an over-sized ring on his finger, have greasy hair, a spotty face and crooked teeth.
Nothing worse than Cheap Aftershave Man save The Stinker. You recognise him as soon as you shake his sweaty hand, and immediately wish you hadn't closed the door.
3. The Talker
Even before he sits down, he's off emitting a constant stream of nonsense from his gob. On and on he goes, while you look wistfully at the work piled up on your in-tray, and realise that, whatever you do, it won't be enough to get him to shut-up. You'll simply have to keep nodding and let him burn himself out.
4. The Flatterer
This guy, who has deluded himself into thinking that (a) he is good looking, and (b) that being 'good looking' will help him secure a job if he is being interviewed by a member of the opposite sex.
He speaks slowly, in somewhat hushed tones (so you feel obliged to lean in towards him). When he is not looking directly into your (feminine) eyes, he is running his fingers through his jelled-back hair and rolling his head around wistfully on his shoulders. But it's the wink at the end of the interview that makes you want to kill him.
5. Mr Bullshit
Talks about himself the whole interview, rattling off imaginary sales figures, made-up bonuses, and reeling off lists of non-existent clients.
Must mention at least four times that he's not really looking for a new job, and finds it hard to explain that he emailed in his CV for 11 of the last 14 vacancies your firm advertised.
6. Mr Uncool
White socks, polyester tie and dirty brown shoes. No briefcase, but he does bring a carrier bag to the interview (inside you can see his half-eaten lunch, clearly prepared by his equally uncool wife).
You make a note to chew out the recruitment team - how did this guy get passed first base ?
7. Mr Overconfident
Acts like he has already been offered the job - in fact, gives the impression that it is he who is interviewing you!
Talks about bonus buy-outs, notice periods, and start dates. Usually there because he is best mates with one of your firm's top traders. Can't be hired on principle.