You don’t have to even be a fan of the game to recognise that Roy Keane is a serious contender for the title of angriest man in football, but if you were in any doubt as to the sheer levels of rage that pulse through the former Manchester United man’s veins, his new book should help.
"The Second Half" sees Keane leave no stone unturned in his quest to hate, with everyone and everything from Sunderland owner Ellis Short to forgotten Ipswich Town striker Pablo Counageo and even the Class of ’92 in the firing line.
With that in mind, here are five things we didn’t even realise Keane hated ... until now.
Seeing the Colour Blue
Keane’s new book offers up an entirely logical explanation as to part of the reason why the Irishman failed as manager of Ipswich Town.
"I don't like f*****' blue. City were blue. Rangers were blue. My biggest rivals were blue. Is that childish? I couldn't feel it - the chemistry."
Given his dislike of the colour, we can only imagine he holds the boy band Blue in similar contempt, while he’s unlikely to be watching David Lynch’s seminal masterpiece "Blue Velvet", while chomping on a Blue Riband chocolate bar, any time soon.
While it would be no shock to learn Roy Keane hates Robbie Savage – everyone does, after all –his latest tome did offer insight into the former ITV pundit’s dislike of one popular catchphrase, which even spawned its own single during its early noughties heyday.
Recalling the time he phoned the then-Blackburn Rovers midfielder to discuss a move to Sunderland, Keane wrote:
“It went to his voicemail: 'Hi, it's Robbie - whazzup!' like the Budweiser ad. I never called him back. I thought: 'I can't be f****** signing that.'"
His column for The Sun
Writing about football can be a pain at the best of times (take it from me) and though it would be nice to say Roy hated having a column in The Sun because of the intrusive nature of the tabloid press, the reality is that he kind of disliked it because he couldn’t be bothered to say stuff every week.
“I did it for a while - for The Sun. Again, I was being told, 'It's easy money'. I gave it a go, but I ran out of steam. I hated it. Every Friday or Saturday, I'd be down the phone to a journalist giving my verdict on everything. There has to be a point when you honestly say 'I've no opinion on that.'”
He kind of had a point - why write when you can just go on television and hate without any of the hassle of deadlines or sub-editing?
Listening to “Dancing Queen” by Abba
Music is all about opinions. What one person may love another may hate. Take Sweden songsters ABBA, for instance, they’ve sold some 380 million singles and albums worldwide, but they are certainly not everyone's cup of tea.
One man unlikely to picking up a copy of ABBA Gold anytime soon is Roy Keane, who revealed his dislike of the Scandinavian pop sensations after their iconic track “Dancing Queen” came on in the changing room as his Sunderland team prepared for a match a few years back.
"What really worried me was that none of the players - not one - said: 'Get that s*** off.' They were going out to play a match, men versus men, testosterone levels were high. You've got to hit people at pace. F******' 'Dancing Queen.' It worried me. I didn't have as many leaders as I thought."
We won’t be sending him a copy of Mamma Mia on DVD any time soon.
Getting phone calls on the toilet
Now, admittedly, we have some sympathy for Keane on this one, as we know how annoying it can be to receive an important call when taking a trip to the Water Closet to relieve oneself.
Embarassing noises in mind, the call is rarely likely to go on for more than a few minutes and can often leave you feeling unhappy with the outcome of the conversation and even the trip to the lavatory itself.
While for us it may result in being short with a loved one or colleague, when it came to Roy, receiving a call on the loo may have been the difference between him signing for Real Madrid rather than Celtic.
"[My agent] Michael [Kennedy] had given me a heads-up that [Real Madrid sport director] Emilio Butragueno would be phoning, so I took my mobile phone everywhere with me. And - how's your luck - he rang me while I was sitting on the toilet. He said: 'Look Roy, we'll be glad to have you.' The club's board just had to sanction the deal. I took a negative approach.”
Of course his hatred of comedy answerphone messages probably prompted him to take the call rather than reject it. I wonder what he ate for dinner the previous night and whether he now hates that too.
What other things have you learnt that Roy Keane hates? Comments below.