Justin Bieber has turned from adorable pop star to Tasmanian devil in the blink of an eye.
How did this happen?
Act I: Origin of the Biebs
Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, a golden angel by the name of Justin was born in the little town of
Bethlehem Stratford, Ontario.
The good, Canadian people of Stratford (known for its annual Shakespeare festival) gave Justin his first taste of loonies, when they tossed handfuls of oversized Canadian coins into his guitar case on the steps of the Avalon theatre.
Those marble steps are the setting of this video of Biebs singing a *very* high pitched gospel song, one of the first ever recorded.
The pop star's hometown is now pretty much mecca to Beliebers everywhere, who come in droves to take the Official Justin Bieber Tour. Stops include King's Buffet (the site of his first date), Boston Pizza and Subway ... so that's great.
Act II: The Beliebers descend like locusts and Justin finds Selena
El Biebo quickly rocketed to fame, but was relegated to teenybopper status for the first few years. This is sort of how we all thought of him. Right?
But soon, his followers, known as Beliebers, started to change all that. Any public criticism of Bieber was met with swift punishment from rabid fans of all ages. It was all fun and games -- and 3% of Twitter’s total traffic -- for awhile. These days, Beliebers will literally dismantle your life if you’re too vocal a critic. But back in 2011, Biebs hit Harmless Teen Idol status as he started dating Selena Gomez, got some haircuts and started hanging out with Ellen DeGeneres.
Interlude: Beliebers Learn How to File Paternity Suits
But it wasn’t strictly support from Belieber Nation that rocketed our Justin’s career into another stratosphere. For some celebrities, it is the rumor of a sex tape -- or actual sex tape -- that brings their career into mainstream focus. For others, it’s a bombshell of another sort: The Paternity Scandal. There was a bit of a turning point in Bieber’s celebrity in 2011, when a woman named Mariah Yeater filed a paternity suit claiming that she was carrying his unborn baby after a backstage encounter. The claim turned out to be false, but Biebs claimed he almost quit music because of it.
Act III: Biebs matures
Between the moving violations and harmless youthful carousing, a soulful side of Bieber starts to emerge. On a few occasions, Bieber is spotted spending quality Nice Guy time with several baby friends, which is actually very endearing. While cohorts like Rihanna tend to show up late to their own concerts after getting too obliterated to stand up straight, Bieber actually delayed a concert in early 2013 to visit a sick child -- a move that, his reps say, was not a public relations stunt.
Act IV: The breakup. The pot. The Segways.
While taking a spin on that hot slice of energy-efficient transportation he also apparently likes to partake in a bit of the Jolly Green Giant. The JGG, also known as cannabis, has also been detected on his tour buses. Just remember: he's hurting, people.
We Beliebers care about Justin more than ourselves. It breaks our heart seeing him heartbroken.— Justin Bieber (@KidrauhlsDiary) July 5, 2013
Act V: "We were all fans and now we hate him."
While Heartbreak Road is paved with millions of fans and millions more dollars, the post-Selena era finds Bieber turning to burly bodyguards for comfort as he stumbles outside far too many Hollywood clubs.
He also faced the wrath of hordes of British fans after showing up two hours late (he says 40 minutes) to a gig at London's O2 arena. "We were all fans and now we hate him," said one disappointed father.
Usher tried to defend Bieber on Ellen, but no one cared because it's too late, the Biebs hath fallen.
... which brings us to where we are today, dear reader. The Biebs of yore – of innocent dates at King's Buffet and gospel songs – appears to be a thing of the past. Along with an appalling monkey abandonment, pissing in mop buckets and cursing out presidents is hardly surprising given his recent behavior. And yet ... And yet ... the Biebs did call up ye olde Clinton (who knows a thing or two about apologies) and give him his most sincere "I'm so sorry, boss". Is it possible that there's still a glimmer of Canadian goodness within his cold, cold heart? Let's hope so. Biebs. Come back.
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