I haven't read a survey I liked more since the one that said one in four British vets have treated a drunk dog.
So anyway, how about this: 79% of dog owners get fake Christmas trees to avoid injury to their dogs. My mind filled with intoxicating images of labradors trying to do a wee against a real tree, knocking it over, breaking the window and being pelted with broken glass and maybe snow. In fact, the main problem is that they get pine needles stuck in their paws. So it's not dramatic, but it's not very nice, and you still have to go to the vet.
The website that conducted the survey – dogsblog.com, which is very useful if you want to rehome a dog, or look at cute pictures of dogs – helpfully compiled the top-five festive dangers to dogs. In with a bullet at number one is chocolate, for the possible theobromine poisoning. Number two is antifreeze – I was just about to be more precise, but you don't need to know what's in it, all you need to know is that it's blue and you shouldn't drink it. Then pine needles, glass decorations and crowded kitchens.
To this expert advice, I will add the top-five festive dog-dangers that I have observed: broken glass in gutters, dropped by drunken idiots probably wearing flashing deely boppers and thinking that's funny; drunken idiots in your own house, dropping things on your dog; dogs eating tinsel or silver foil, then having to expel them later (I'm not sure that this is dangerous, but it looks uncomfortable); dogs being dressed as Santa (it's humiliating; and also, unrealistic, because a reindeer would never obey a dog); and finally, dogs straightforwardly overeating.
Poor mutts, they think Bonfire Night is bad, but yule is far more of a hazard.
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